Igrot Kodesh · Letter 625 — Shidduchim

By the grace of Hashem,

19 Sivan 5710,

I reply, in my humble opinion, to the questions you posed to me.

You will surely conform to the instructions of my father-in-law, the Rebbe. When you find it necessary to leave the place where you find yourself, you will go to ... and the Holy One, blessed be He, will fulfill the blessings of the tzaddik stated in the letter he addressed to you. You will therefore make "a good journey, and Hashem will help you in all your needs, as well as the members of your family."[1]

When the date of your journey draws near, you will let us know, and your name will again be mentioned at the tomb of my father-in-law, the Rebbe.

You ask me about a woman for whom it would be dangerous to be with child, and you ask whether she is permitted to take measures for this.[2] There are ways that Chazal* permitted during marital relations or after them. You may consult Responsa of the Tzemach Tzedek, Even HaEzer chapter 89, which gives a permission, not following in this the more stringent opinions. The Sdei Chemed, collection on the laws of marriage, chapter 1 and Pe'as, mentions his opinion.

You must therefore address yourself to a Rav in your country who is capable of deciding the halacha and who knows what should be done in this matter. You will lay out for him the means you know of, and this Rav will tell you what the law is.

You may consult on this Rav Mordechai Perlov, who is currently in France. His address is: "36, rue Yves Kermen, Boulogne sur Seine, France." You will tell him that I advised you to contact him, and he will reply.

You will surely indicate to me, as you did before, the situation in your area in the field of education, and what is happening with you, the members of your family and your brother-in-law.

With my blessing for a good settling in and for all the best,

Rav Menachem Schneerson

As you asked, I enclose for you five letters of my father-in-law, the Rebbe, that he sent here.