Igrot Kodesh · Letter 6181 — Chinuch

By the grace of Hashem*,

12 Nissan* 5718,

Brooklyn,

Shalom* u'vracha*,

After a very long silence, I have duly received your letter of 10 Nissan*. Of course, I was sorry to read there that there is, for the time being, nothing new concerning your son, may Hashem* grant him long life. Now, you give me no explanation on this subject and, unless I am mistaken, your son himself has not written to me since before Rosh Hashanah*. Furthermore, in the letter I received at that time, he told me nothing of all this. Not knowing exactly the reason for this situation, I imagine that your son is particular and that he attaches importance to insignificant details. Now, I am surprised by this. Why does he adopt such an attitude? Does he not know that it runs counter to the requirements of our Torah*, Torah* of life? Moreover, your son was, for many years, a student of the Yeshivah* Tomchei Temimim*. And, in all other domains, he puts into practice the teachings of Chassidus*. Why, regarding this point of immense importance, this fundamental mitzvah*, does he not wish to comply, as the Torah* demands?

Of course, I do not mean to say that one must get engaged with one's eyes closed, without knowing how and when. Nevertheless, I spoke to him about this a very long time ago. I also wrote to him on this subject, specifying that he must energetically seek a good match. For a long time, he could have considered one of the proposals made to him at that time, in particular in our Holy Land, where the number of interesting proposals is much greater than in other countries. Of course, I am not writing all of this to cause you pain, Hashem* forbid, but rather to emphasize to you that if you yourself or other people have influence on your son, you must convince him to radically change his approach to this question, in accordance with the teaching of our holy Torah*, as I said above.

If you wish to show this letter to your son, I have absolutely no objection. I leave you sole judge of this. We are approaching the joyful days of Pesach* and you have seen, with your own eyes, the kindness of Hashem*, including in domains involving great difficulties, far beyond the situation your son is facing. May Hashem* therefore grant that this moment be propitious and that you may very soon announce good news to me in this matter. You conclude your letter by observing that, for others as well, this takes time. To my knowledge, this is the case, most of the time, for reasons that are beyond one's control. In your case, however, and as I have said, I imagine that a certain way of thinking is creating an obstacle, that insignificant details are being taken into account. With my blessing for a kosher* and joyful festival of Pesach*,

On behalf of the Rebbe, shlita*,

the secretary,

P.S.: I could have addressed your son directly, but I am not doing so because I do not know why he himself no longer writes to me. You will therefore communicate to him the content of this letter or even its entirety. I simply add that I send him my blessing for a kosher* and joyful festival of Pesach*, that he become positively and very soon engaged.