Igrot Kodesh · Letter 6083 — Faith & Bitachon

(First day of Rosh Chodesh* Adar* 5718)

I am responding to your letter of 22 Shevat*, in which you write: "My mind tells me that there cannot be a better proposal (note 1: Of engagement), but my heart refuses it." However, you do not give the reason for this refusal of the heart. Concretely, the heart is far from being secondary in everything concerning engagements (note 2: Various letters of the Rebbe emphasize that one becomes engaged on the basis of essential points and not secondary ones). It is necessary to feel at least a beginning of attraction or, at the minimum, an assurance that it will come subsequently. If one does not feel this sentiment and if the heart refuses, it is clear that one must take this into account.

What does not seem clear to me, in your letter, is the following statement that you formulate. If the heart does not have a secondary role, "I will have to wait." Is this a matter of waiting for another proposal or for an evolution of this same proposal? It is on this basis that you will be able to decide what comes next. And, may Hashem*, Who extends His providence to each man and each woman, guide you on the path that is truly good — a good that is visible and tangible.